Take a moment for yourself, and yourself alone, every day. Consider getting massages, pedicures, etc. , whatever makes you feel relaxed, on a regular basis. Don’t use a scale. Sometimes seeing a number on a scale can have a massive emotional impact on us, yet that number doesn’t necessarily relate to how we feel or what we think of ourselves. Don’t set yourself up for disappointment. [4] X Research source
Sit down and make a list of all your positive qualities and abilities. [6] X Expert Source Leah MorrisLife Coach Expert Interview. 19 June 2020. You may surprise yourself as to how accomplished you are, and how proud you should feel. [7] X Trustworthy Source Cleveland Clinic Educational website from one of the world’s leading hospitals Go to source Try not to compare yourself to other people, whether they’re celebrities, friends or family members. You are not them, so there’s no need to compare yourself to them. You are your own person and comparisons are not required. Learn to love you self - as you are. You’re unique and that’s awesome! No matter what you’ve experienced in your life, it’s been a long and difficult journey and you survived.
Go through a list of questions with yourself about your hair, then base your haircut request on your answers: Do you need to be able to tie your hair back? How much time do you have to ‘do’ your hair each morning? What styling tools (blow dryer, flat iron, etc. ) do you have and know how to use? Google hair styles and review the images. If you see something that matches what you’re hoping to get, print it out and bring it with you. This works really well if you’re looking to get your hair coloured. It’ll save you trying to describe the shade of colour you want in words. Provide as much detail as possible to the stylist before they start. Explain exactly what you want and what you need to do with your hair. During or after your haircut, ask your stylist for advice on how to style your hair properly. You may not be able to do it exactly the same way they can, but they can teach you several tricks.
Accentuate your best ‘assets’, as opposed to focusing on hiding the things you don’t like about yourself. Wear something that you’ll be known for - like a trademark. Maybe that’s always having really awesome earrings, or always wearing bright coloured shoes. Whatever works for you. If you’re not sure where to start, consider making an appointment with a personal shopper at your local mall. They can help you sort through the bazillion options available and choose which ones work for you.
Standing - keep your shoulders back and relaxed; pull in your abdomen; keep your feet hip distance apart; balance your weight evenly on both of your feet; and let your hands hang naturally at your sides. Avoid tilting your head in any direction, or locking your knees. [11] X Trustworthy Source Mayo Clinic Educational website from one of the world’s leading hospitals Go to source Sitting - make sure both of your feet can rest comfortably on the ground while your knees are level with your hips; sit back in the chair; put a rolled towel or pillow behind your lower back (if the chair doesn’t have lumbar support); pull your head towards the ceiling; tuck your chin in a little; keep your upper back and neck in a straight line; and relax your shoulders. [12] X Trustworthy Source Mayo Clinic Educational website from one of the world’s leading hospitals Go to source Sleeping - maintain a position that keeps your back curved naturally; try to avoid sleeping on your stomach; firmer mattresses are better than soft mattresses; and if you sleep on your side, put a pillow between your knees to keep your upper leg aligned with your spine. [13] X Trustworthy Source Cleveland Clinic Educational website from one of the world’s leading hospitals Go to source Lift with your knees, not your back. When you’re lifting something heavy, keep your back straight and bend your knees. When you stand up, straighten your knees. Don’t bend forward at the waist to pick something up.
Don’t fidget. Stand in one spot, with your feet planted on the ground hip-width apart. Stand evenly on both feet, don’t shift from one foot to another. Lean back in your chair when you’re sitting. Don’t fidget your lower body. If you need to cross your legs, do so comfortably and loosely. Keep you hands in a relaxed position. Look in one spot, or one general area. Keep your head still. Hold you head upwards, with your chin level to the ground. Hold your hands together in front or behind you when not using them. If you grip your hands together, do so lightly. But don’t hide your hands in your pockets and don’t put grip your hand in a fist. Don’t rush. Walk steadily. Talk steadily as well, don’t rush to get your words out. Confident people are not in a hurry. Pause every now and again - whether walking or talking. Be comfortable and don’t fidget when there’s a break in the conversation or everyone goes silent. Be assertive. Smile. Look people in the eyes. If you’re shaking someone’s hand, do so firmly.
Use this opportunity to explore the specific qualities you admire in others, and how you can work to achieve them yourself. Select role models for yourself based on these qualities. Don’t be afraid to tell other people what you admire about them. Nothing boosts confidence and self-esteem better than compliments from people who admire you.
When speaking assertively to someone else, remember to: look at them without staring them down; keep the volume of your voice normal, and your tone respectful; don’t use distracting hand gestures; and respect the other person’s personal space. Translate your feelings into “I” statements. “I” statements consist of four parts: the feeling, the behaviour, the effect, and the preference - “I feel xxx when xxx because xxx. I’d prefer xxx. ” For example, “I feel annoyed when you tell me what to do in emails because it makes me feel disrespected. I’d prefer you ask me to do something rather than tell me to do something. ”
Preparing yourself in advance can also include saying no. Don’t feel obligated to do something simply because someone asked. If you cannot realistically accomplish what they’re asking, say no. After the event or situation has happened, reward yourself for a job well done.
Change your vocabulary and stop using the word “should. ” “Should” implies a level of perfectionism that isn’t necessary, and can sometimes enforce the unnecessary and useless expectations of others. Replace the critical thoughts you have about yourself with encouraging thoughts. Give yourself constructive criticism that can help you make a positive change. [19] X Research source Don’t feel the need to take responsibility for everything. Not only does it increase your stress levels and overwhelm you, you take away the opportunity for others to be responsible for something (including themselves). If something was in your control, and you made a mistake, take the blame. However, if something was out of your control, there’s no need for you to take the blame or feel guilty about it.
Look at yourself in the mirror at least once a day and make a positive comment about yourself. [21] X Expert Source Leah MorrisLife Coach Expert Interview. 19 June 2020. Don’t just think about the positive comments, say them. If you like the way your new hair cut looks, say so!
Take risks. Don’t look at every new learning opportunity as something that must either be won or lost, or perfected. Understand ahead of time that it’s okay if you suck at something, because you can still have fun. But unless you take a walk outside your comfort zone and take a small risk, you may never know how fun it is to learn something new without any expectations. [23] X Research source
