Before you go out, have a few funny anecdotes lined up, should the opportunity to talk to a girl arise. Continually scan your environment for suitable candidates; you never know when a hottie is going to wander by. Pay attention to your surroundings so that when an opportunity arises for small talk, you can quickly think up an icebreaker comment about something nearby. [1] X Research source
At very least, make sure that your clothing and hair are clean and presentable. If you’ve got a few extra bucks to spend, invest in a new pair of shoes.
People who are rushing to get to work or or an early class are unlikely to be in the mood to stop and chat. Aim for the lunch hour, or mid-morning, when many people go out for a coffee break.
Even though you may actually just be walking around aimlessly looking for girls, it’s best to have some kind of destination in mind, in case an opportunity for conversation or an invitation arises (“I was just on my way to the Farmer’s market, would you care to join me?”) You can also try “getting lost” in the vicinity of a known destination, so you can ask a girl for directions. (“I was just looking for the Apple store, but seem to be turned around. Can you help me out?”)
If you do not see her looking back, that does not necessarily mean she is not interested. She may not have seen you, or you may have missed her glance. You’re going to have to keep at it to find out. If you do catch her looking back, and she quickly turns away from you and walks on, that’s a signal that she knows you were trying to connect with her, and is brushing you off. Let this one go.
Do not tap her on the back or startle her from behind. This can come across as threatening. It would also be inappropriate and frightening to the woman if you were to run after her, or approach her all sweaty and out of breath. As Han Solo once advised, “fly casual. ”
If the girl seems to be speeding up, making it hard for you to catch up, she is aware of your approach, and trying to shake you off. If she gets out her phone to make a call, this is another strategy for shaking off an unwanted advance. Take it as a hint to back off and leave her alone. Do not try to follow her until she is done with her call, or the next call she makes could be to the police. Don’t follow a person into an office building or other place of business. If she casually wanders into a coffee shop or store, you may try approaching her there, but bear in mind that there is a good chance she is alarmed by your approach, and looking for witnesses and/or assistance in getting rid of you.
If you are standing in front of a restaurant, you might say “Something smells good, doesn’t it?” If a bus just drove off leaving a person behind at the stop, you might remark “TriMet, right?” and give her a knowing glance.
Crass compliments about butts and sexiness will offend many women, so it’s best to avoid them.
Smile and maintain eye contact. Stand confidently, with your chest out and shoulders back. Begin with your body turned slightly away from her, then turn your body towards her when you she says something engaging or amusing to show your increased interest. Try to keep the pitch of your voice low, and resist the temptation to speak too quickly. Be friendly. [5] X Research source
Pay attention to the conversational clues she gives you. If she switches topics, do it too. If a girl is interested in you, she is going to help you out and do her part to keep the conversation rolling. If you are doing all the work, it’s probably not going well, and you should prepare to walk away gracefully.
If you have some free time, you could invite her to walk with you for a bit, or sit down for a cup of coffee, but the anticipation of having to wait to get to know you more can often work to your advantage, so don’t prolong it too long.
If the woman fails to respond, does not return your smile, or looks away when you attempt eye contact, she is probably not interested and is trying to be polite about it. Take the hint and move on! If she turns away, or walks off, do not try to follow her, just let her go and don’t take it personally. If she says something rude to you, don’t retaliate. Remember that YOU are the one who tried to intrude on her life uninvited, not the other way around. If you feel like you have to say something, say “I’m sorry to have bothered you,” or “Have a great day!” and leave it at that.
