Guilt and shame can and do occur together. Shame is feeling badly about yourself, unworthy or wrong. To eliminate shame, avoid relationships with people who cannot see your self-worth based on yourself and instead foster relationships with people who recognize your intrinsic value. [1] X Research source
Write down your strengths. Think about what you are good at. It could be that you are a nice person, that you are empathetic, or that you are great at tennis. If you are having trouble thinking of strengths, ask those around you what your strengths are. Speak to your best self. Imagine that you are having a conversation with your best or ideal self. Think about what kind of advice your best self would give you. You may find that a part of you has intelligent, kind, thoughtful things to say to you. [4] X Research source
To avoid comparing yourself to other people try the following. Say you think about how someone is really good at cooking compared to you and this makes you feel envious and bad about yourself. Try to change your thoughts by focusing on something else that you are really good at. Then, instead of comparing yourself to someone else, compare how good you are at it relative to your skill level 2 years ago. Focus on how you have been growing and improving rather than how you compare to someone else.
To diminish comparing yourself to others, first you have to catch yourself thinking of a comparative thought. For example, if you think, “Gosh, I wish I was able to have a great career like Emily. " When you catch yourself thinking these types of thoughts, you can say, “I’ll bet that she worked very hard to get where she is today. I wonder what I can do to get ahead in a career I love. " Then you can make a list of actions you can take to further your career in the right direction.
Buy tickets for the people behind you in line at the movies. Donate your time to a charitable cause you care about. Buy a nice warm blanket or meal for a homeless person. Spend time thinking about what makes someone in your life great. Write him a letter saying as much and thanking him for being a part of your life.
If you are struggling with accepting the way you look and you are overweight, engage in steps to reduce your body fat. Try eating slightly smaller meals, say, by 10-15%; do your best to get regular exercise. If you do not like the way you look, you can also try giving yourself a make-over. Go buy some new clothes, get a new haircut, try out some new make-up. Take a peek in the mirror and see what you think!
Ask a friend to talk about what is bothering you. You may find that even venting and getting things off your chest is helpful. Talk to a therapist. Seek out a psychotherapist in your area to help you work through your problems. To find a local therapist, do an internet search with the terms “psychotherapist + your city’s name or zipcode. " You can also try searching for a therapist here: http://locator. apa. org/index. cfm?event=search. text
To expand your posture, tilt your head back slightly, extend your arms or put them on your hips, stretch out your legs, and/or expand your chest.
