Your fear causes intense anxiety or panic. You recognize that your fear is not rational. You avoid specific places or situations. Avoidance of the fear causes distress and interferes with your functioning. The fear has persisted 6 months or more.
Racing heartbeat Difficulty breathing Feeling dizzy Sweating Overwhelming anxiety, panic Feeling pressured to do it Needing to escape Feeling detached Feeling like you may faint or die Feeling powerless to your fear, even if you know it’s irrational
While a fear response is natural for this kind of event, some events may be unavoidable. Recognize that your fear is valid, but also needs to be addressed.
Realize that fear can be good, and acknowledge the positive and protective role it has.
Name your fear. Sometimes fear makes itself known immediately, clearly, and other times it’s more difficult to name those anxious feelings lurking in the back of your mind. Let your fear rise to the surface and give it a name. It may be concrete (like a fear of cats) or situational (like a fear of being called on in class). Don’t judge your fears. Acknowledge what comes up with no attachment to “good” or “bad. ”
If your fear is commitment, imagine yourself happily with a partner. If your fear is heights, imagine yourself conquering a tough hike. Connect with the feeling of accomplishment. If your fear is spiders, imagine yourself seeing a spider and feeling neutral.
When your fear arises, pause and reflect on your actual risk. Talk back to your negative thoughts or false beliefs and say, “I recognize that some dogs are vicious, but the vast majority of dogs are gentle. It is unlikely I will get bitten. ”
If you’re afraid of dogs, start by looking at a badly drawn doodle of a dog done in silly colors. Look at it until you feel no fear response. Then, look at a photo of a dog, then a video of a dog. Examine it until no fear response exists. Go to a park where you know one or a few dogs will be on-leash and watch them until you feel no fear. Go to a friend’s house who has a dog and watch him interact with a dog until no fear response is elicited. Ask a friend to let you touch or pet his dog while the dog is restrained by your friend until you feel neutral. Finally, be near a dog and spend one-on-one time with a dog.
Running from fears never improves the way you feel about a fear. Next time you experience a fear, verbally engage the fear, using words that describe your fear and anxiety.
Try deep breathing exercises. Focus on your breath, and start counting each breath: four seconds inhale, then four seconds exhale. Once this is comfortable, elongate your breath to six seconds. If you notice your muscles tensing, be conscious to relax them. One way to do this is to clench all the muscles in your body for three seconds, then relax them. Do this two or three times to melt stress throughout your body.
Understanding the positives of fear can help you use it to your advantage. For instance, many people experience stage fright, yet the fear leading up to a performance can help you be in the moment and focus intensely on what is before you. Learn to acknowledge the fear and then direct it to where it will be most beneficial Most people experience fear prior to an event, yet experience no fear when in the middle of a situation. Remember that fear heightens your senses so that you have the ability to perform efficiently and powerfully.
When you feel fear of something unfamiliar, take it as a sign that you need to get to know a person or situation better. If you feel a flash of fear about an upcoming deadline or event, make it an opportunity to make a plan of action to get fully prepared, whether that means getting started on a paper, rehearsing for a play or practicing a speech.
